Well, its been 6 weeks since my last day of radiotherapy and today/tonight I attended my first social function with Sarah.

Thats not strictly true as I went to a birthday BBQ last weekend at Craig and Julia's which was lovely, but this one involved getting really dressed up - it was 'Mitchells Wedding'.

Matthew and Claires wedding to be precise, held at Whirlow Brook Hall in Sheffield.  We arrived (just) in time for the ceremony.  Getting ready for the do had really took it out of me, I had to have a lie down on the bed for a while after my shower.  During the day I'd also had to make sure I took on all my nutrition for the day which meant cramming in the Fortisp milk shakes a bit, as obviously the last thing I wanted to be doing at a wedding was taking my PEG tube out and feeding myself with a syringe while people were tucking into their wedding breakfast!!

When we arrived we were immediately impressed with the attention to detail the couple had given their day.  The flowers were nice, the Orders of Service fantastically done, everything had been thought through and organised brilliantly.  The ceremony was paced well and the timings were even laid out for the whole day in the Orders of Service.

We all trooped out into the beautiful gardens for the photos, and here are a small sample of some of them;

Confetti Throwing....

Me and Sarah...

Mr and Mrs Mitchell....

The Owlstalk Geekettes - (l-r Mrs Bully, Mrs Jeremiah, Mrs Marshy, Mrs Essix Blue and Mrs Grandad)!  The names are related to internet login names on the Owlstalk messageboard which is where we all met - some 8 years ago!.  Its also how we all met Matt who got married today!  How geeky is that!?!

Me below wondering whether I should have bought the next size down in suits!!

After the photos we went inside for the food, which was a carvery of Roast Pork, Lamb and the nicest cut of beef you could wish to see at a wedding.  There was a great selection of veg as well as the usual roast potatoes, new potatoes and cauliflower cheese.  I collected a portion for my friend Dean who has a good appetite - and he ate most of it too after he'd finished his own - what a man!!  I even tried a couple of the garden peas (they got stuck in my throat!!), a sliver from one of the carrots (it also got stuck in my throat) and the very soggy bottom of a Yorkshire Pudding that had been soaking in gravy (I'm STILL trying to swallow that!!).  The food thing is getting extremely frustrating and the pains in my mouth and tongue just aren't improving at all.  In fact - they feel like they are getting worse.

On to the speechs, Sarah was dabbing her eyes at Claires Dad's speech, we all enjoyed Matts go, and Lee's best man speech brought the house down! I can't believe he got away with mentioning Matts misdemeanours with a police horse at a Wednesday away game a few years ago which gained him an appointment with Preston Magistrates Court!!  An hilarious best mans speech - well done Lee.

We all retired to the bar shortly after and met a few other friends before I pulled our personal curtain down on the evening about 9pm and we came away before the disco got going - the efforts of the day and 5 hours out in public had completely tired me out, the pains in my mouth were getting worse as a result of talking so much and I just needed to get away.

But it was a brilliant day, and as I write this blog and publish these photos the do will probably be in full swing now - and I never got my dance with the bride!!!

Never mind - I'm sure I can address that little issue in the very near future.

I know Matts a regular reader of the blog - so can i just take this opportunity to wish both Matt and Claire the very best wishes for their future - I hope all your dreams come true.

Nigel xx

Ive just checked and realised its been a week since my last update.

To be honest, there hasn't been anything to say.  I had hoped to have something positive to say about the mouth problems having been diagnosed and prescribed last week.  Have taken the medicine faithfully but as yet without any sign of improvement.  Its been nearly a fortnight now and I'm getting absolutely sick of it - I can't even drink water at the moment.

The real severe pain is on my tongue and I'm sure its that which is preventing me from making progress with eating.  I can't bear to have anything in the mouth near the tongue right now. 

Its a real shame because this weekend I had sincerely hoped I might be eating, even slightly.  Its going to be a busy one.  On Friday I am delighted to be attending a good friends wedding, Saturday will see Sarah and I make a mad dash to the Lakes for the Holker Hall Festival which has an abundance of food stalls as well as staying at our fave guest house on Saturday night - and I was really looking forward to a plate of scrambled eggs on Sunday morning!  Sunday means a mad dash back home for my nieces 18th Birthday lunch at Aston Hall Hotel - and what a menu that is!

Never mind.  One day at a time.

Enjoy the rest of your week,

Nigel xx

Hi guys - can I thank everybody for your advice regarding the mouth problem as posted yesterday - has many tips left on here and via text/phone calls.

I received a call from Bernie Foran at the hospital this morning regarding my blood tests  last week - everything was absolutely fine except my blood is showing as slightly deficient in potassium - and apprently that would explain why Ive been feeling so drained and lethargic.  I need to start eating banana's - or sucking liquorice!! (I'm already picturing the box of Allsorts )

I explained that at the moment I can't imagine eating or drinking anything, explained the symptoms and the ulcers on my tongue.

It seems I am once again afflicted with the oral thrush - and she suggested I contact my GP to organise a prescription for Fluconazole which will clear it up in 2/3 days.  The relief.

So - just contacted the Health Centre and should be able to collect my medicine this afternoon.

On other fronts I am now regularly managing 5 Fortisips a day through my peg instead of the 3 I had been doing before - so hopefully my weight loss should be arrested and can now begin to stabilise. 

Finally, I'm not sure if you caught Breakfast TV on the BBC this morning.  On it there was a journalist from Nottingham who has been living in Sheffield, Adrian Sudbury, who has been treated for Leukaemia.  Adrian had had a number of stem-cell transplants and unfortunately has been told his leukaemia has returned again.  He has chosen not to have any more treatments and has just weeks to live.  He is dedicating his last weeks on the planet to appeal for more people to add their names to the Bone Marrow Donor database - and I would appeal for you all to check out his blog (award-winning) for more info.  There is a video there explaining what bone marrow donation is all about - and its not the complex and painful thing that people often assume.

His blog is at http://baldyblog.freshblogs.co.uk/ .  If you do visit him - please let him know that I sent you.

All the best

Nigel xx

Since the elation of Thursday's news from the hospital I've come back to earth with a bit of a bang.

The progress I had appeared to be making with the throat and mouth hasn't just stopped - its gone backwards.  I can't imagine orange cordial right now never mind anything else.  Even water is incredibly painful.

The ulcers on my tongue are huge, and my throat seems permanently glued up - its extremely sore and I'm finding it very difficult to swallow.

I've tried the mouthwashs I've been given, and even a salt solution to no avail.  Has anybody any advice?  Anything thats worked for you in a similar situation?

Cheers - its been 5 days now and its really getting me down.

All the best

Nigel xx

Regular bloggers will no doubt be aware that today was my first review appointment at Weston Park.

We got there at 3pm - first I had a blood test then got weighed,  I have now officially lost 25kg since my first weigh-in session on 29th February - thats 4 stones folks!!!  I knew I'd managed a fair bit as I bought a pair of size 34 501's yesterday - and they were baggy as anything on my bum... I will no doubt grow into them

Next it was in to see the oncologist Bernie who was amazed at the progress I have made. They were concerned about the weight loss - more concerned than I am if Im brutally honest - but obviously I need to put a halt to the slide now.

We then went to the examination room - she had a good look round in the mouth and throat and then delivered the following response "Well, the only abnormality in there now is the effects of the radiotherapy'.  I wasn't sure what this meant so I asked '.. and the lump?'

'It's gone'

For posterity - I will just repeat that again.  'It's gone'.

Further probing revealed that while there can be no guarantees that the cancer will not return - right now the tumour that was treated has responded in the very best way possible.  Which is FANTASTIC NEWS!

We all sat and had a good cry - well, me and Sarah anyway!    Fortunately a hospital is the ideal place for doing this - no shortage of tissues!

So - I'm off now to have a celebratory drink (probably orange cordial) and maybe even some mashed potato for tea!!!

I will update again when the news has sunk in some more - but for now please join me in rejoicing that I've just burnt my nose having got far too close to the light at the end of the tunnel that we discussed back in December!!!!

Thank you everybody for all your support - and thanks for continuing to stop by and read what has been a very emotional blog at times - thank you for your prayers and love and making me feel like I really am the luckiest person alive.

Nigel xx

I wasn't sure how to title this blog - I really wanted to go with 'It never rains but it pours' - but didn't want to stress anybody who receives these updates by email...

It was an eventful weekend to say the least.  We had a bit of a birthday bash for me on Sunday - it was intended to be family only with Martin and Teresa - small reward for his efforts over the last few months.  We lit the barbie, had the gazebo's in the garden and it was really nice to see everybody in a relaxed setting instead of the hectic environments of hospitals etc thats been more prevalent recently.

Unfortunately the combination of hot weather and the exertions of the morning while setting up for the day really took their toll on me. I'm still struggling for energy.  By 6pm I was totally wiped out and ended up in bed around 7.15 - even though I still had guests.  As a surprise Sarah had invited a second tranche of guests to come for birthday cake and wine around 5pm - and can I just take this opportunity to apologise to all of you for disappearing in the way I did.  I have never ever done that before and it felt really strange and weird doing it yesterday.

I was awoken from my snooze by my sister who was making what sounded like a call to the Ambulance service. I wasn't wrong - Dad had got up from his chair to leave and his hip had twinged - just like it did about 18 months ago when it dislocated...

Dad's had 2 hip replacements in the last few years - and the second one was as a result of doing exactly what he did yesterday.  Just getting up from his chair.  He was in severe pain - the ambulance arrived and off he went - eventually - to hospital.  He's still there now - they have managed to manipulate his hip back in but he's wearing a brace and it sounds like he will need hip replacement number 3.  Apart from the obvious pain - it means that they now won't be able to go on the holiday they booked just a few weeks ago.  They usually go away in February and were forced to concel that one too because of me being ill.

I get really angry about things like that.  I know I shouldn't - Dad tells me all the time 'Inchallah' - not sure if that spells right but the basic translation is 'If Allah will's it...'  Mum and Dad are the absolutely least deserving recipients of such bloody awful luck.  They spend their whole lives helping out and really deserve a much better rub of the green.

Anyway - it was the worst possible way to round off what had been a lovely day.  I felt almost normal welcoming friends around again.  I even had a half pint of Worthingtons Creamflow and it even tasted like beer - theres progress!!

Still no food - so it will be a while before I can taste my latest BBQ creation - Pork Ribs marinated overnight in a Apple Juice, Maple Syrup and Chilli dressing.  They looked and smelt great as they were being cooked and the real good news was the adults loved em and the kids didn't - so something you can cook without worrying they will be all gone by the time you get away from the BBQ!! 

I'm going to sign off now - more on Thursday when I've had my hospital appointment.

All the best (and get well soon Dad),

Nigel xx

Since my last update I've been quite busy...

You will recall I'd been feeling very rough although had improved enough to get to Clumber Park with Mum and Dad.  Well since Friday last week my life has been a hectic blur of various different events and milestones...!

On Saturday I didn't do a great deal, went off to the garden centre with Martin and we purchased weed and feed for the grass - then I sat outside and watched Martin mow it!!  I did however try a glass of orange cordial - the first thing I'd drunk that wasn't water for about 5 weeks.  I had to sip it very slowly but it was lovely to taste something that wasn't as bland as water.  When Martin had finished I had a drive down to Aston Ponds to see our Dan who has really taken to fishingin the last few months.  I sat with him for a while enjoying the weather.  In the evening I went next door to Christines 60th birthday party - I didn't stay too long as I was coughing a lot but it was lovely to get showered and changed into nice clothes and go out for a while.

Sunday brought the dilemma of whether to go to Hillsborough.  I knew I would find it very tiring - but the kids were going and Sarah had a ticket so I decided I would give it my best shot.  It took me ages to get from the car park to my seat and I was absolutely shattered by the time I made it - but it was well worth it to see a few friendly faces and obviously to sit in a sold out Hillsborough and watch them win 4-1 to secure our place in the Championship next season.

On Monday I was determined to continue pushing boundaries.  It was the Bank Holiday of course, and the kids came round to spend the day.  I was determined that I was going to cook for them later in the day and with the weather being so nice I thought 'what the hell lets barbecue'.  That involved cleaning the barbecue (and its a big one) and preparing the meat.  I made Piri Piri chicken and homemade burgers, Mary joined us and it was brilliant to be cooking again - even if I couldn't try anything I'd made.

On Tuesday I had a lovely day - the weather at the moment is gorgeous here so I spent the day in and out of the garden, popping backwards and forwards in the car and generally relaxing after the weekend.  I cooked again that night for Sarah - breaded chicken escalope with side serving of sauteed courgette and cherry tomatoes.

Wednesday again was great weather.  Mum and Dad took me into Sheffield to Cole Brothers to buy me my birthday present, a collective gift from all the family of a food processor - I can't wait to begin using that for preparing sauces etc.  Got home at lunchtime and we sat in the garden for a while again.  Once again I cooked - 3 days on the trot now - and for such a simple meal the smell was absolutely amazing.  Its the first time I've been really really hungry in weeks - my hunger pangs have vanished completely as time has progressed but they came back with a vengeance last night as Sarah was eating her tea.

All I made was a very simple pasta dish - basically cubed chicken breast sauteed with a little garlic and chilli - then tossed in the remaining cherry tomatoes from yesterday with half a tin of chopped tomatoes.  When it was stirred through the pasta it looked amazing and smelt absolutely fantastic.  Theres one dish I will hopefully be trying very soon...

And so to Thursday - I'm still sat in bed as I type this and my throat feels tighter today than it has for nearly a week - still - they say I will have good days and bad days...

Heres to the weekend and hopefully some progress on the eating front.  So far I have tried a tiny piece of Sarah's onion bhaji (burnt my throat for about half an hour!), a tiny piece of chicken from Sarahs Chicken Balti on Sunday night (burnt my throat again) and a quarter of a slice of boiled ham (tasted like gravel and felt like gravel in the mouth).  I think I may well have to revert to ice creams and rice puddings before we get on to the exciting stuff!!

Anyway - have a great weekend all of you and I will be back next week with more (hopefully positive) news!!!

Nigel xx

PS - By the way - first review with the oncologist next Thursday afternoon!!!

Its an intentional spelling error - ok...

Well its Friday, and of course its Bank Holiday weekend.  I feel amazed I've actually made it to here from the start of the week.  I really did hit rock bottom last weekend and the time I spent in bed was most welcome.  I couldn't speak at all and resorted to writing notes, then using the laptop to communicate.  Thanks to Eddie who sent me a link to some voice software allowing me to type what I wanted to say - although Sarah and others weren't really amused too much by my Steven Hawkings approach!!

I started to feel a little more normal late on Wednesday, and I'm delighted I managed to get out of th house ysterday afternoon for a little walk and fresh air in Clumber Park nearby with Mum and Dad and the dogs.

I havent been sleeping a lot at all, and to be totally honest I haven't been getting the correct level of ntrition through my peg either - so I am a good deal weaker than I was last week.  I reckon I've lost some more weight as well but can't confirm this as we have no scales at home.  Although I did buy a pair of jeans today 2 sizes smaller than usual and they are still really baggy, esepcially around the bum...

Been watching a lot of snooker on the box this week, really rooting for Ronnie O'Sullivan and his 147 the other day was outstanding.

I was bought a ticket for Hillsborough this week - its a sell-out game this Sunday against Norwich where a win is required to keep us in the Championship.  I'm really not sure I'm going - we will see how I feel on Sunday.

All the best, Nigel xx