"You've got to accentuate the positive
Eliminate the negative
Latch on to the affirmative
Don't mess with Mister In-Between"

I neglected my usual Friday blog - apologies to the regulars.   I met my oncologist Bernie for my usual weekly review on Friday and we discussed a number of things, not least the hearing problem created by the chemo.  She reassured me that having already had 2 out of 3 sessions of chemo, and when I've completed my last session of radiotherapy it may be that no more chemo is required.  So she has said I shouldn't worry about it - there are alternatives that we can fall back on if necessary.

Its been a painful week for the throat, the gravel I keep mentioning that appears to be sitting at the back of my throat now feels like small shards of broken glass that stick in my throat every time I swallow.  I am gargling with a Difflam mouthwash about 6 times daily - Difflam is like an anaesthetic as its supposed to dull the pain - but it doesnt really work.  Im also taking painkillers through my PEG tube - Dihydrocodeine and Soluble Paracetamol.

I now have only 2 weeks of radiotherapy left.  I have completed 5 weeks.  Now THAT is a positive.  After my last session of radiotherapy I don't have to go back to the hospital for 4 weeks to be reviewed, and I'm looking forward to hopefully some good weather so I can get the gazebo out and set my hammock up underneath it. (I have to stay out of the sun for quite some time following the radiotherapy to let my skin recover).  Quite a few of my friends (I'll call them friends for the sake of this post ) often joke about my permatan status and how I always look 'orange'.  Well, with the burns from the radiotherapy my skin is almost purple so there will be a lot of recovery required.  On an ongoing basis the skin around my face will always be far more sensitive to sunlight and therefore I will always need to wear a very high SPF cream in future to prevent burns.

My cold/cough is still here as strong as ever - getting really fed up with that and its associated problems.

On a positive note this week has been very nice socially.  Had some good long chats with several old friends this week, either via text, email, on the phone or in person.  (It really does help to receive your emails and texts - thankyou) Managed to get out to my sisters last night for a change of scenery, and the kids are both back from their breaks at Cornwall and Whitby.  I also managed to persuade Sarah to allow a tv in the bedroom, so was able to watch the Champions League on Tuesday and Wednesday night (while listening to Sheffield Wednesdays commentary against Coventry)...  My good mate Martin also did me proud yesterday by giving the grass its first cut of 2008 - cheers buddy I owe you one.  The beers will be on me just as soon as I'm fit.

On the subject of beer - someone asked me the other day what my first food will be when I get my taste buds back and my throat stops being so painful.  They assumed I'd go with an ice-cold bottle of Bud - which has been my barbequing choice for some years now! (All good barbecue chefs cook with tongs in one hand and beer in the other!)  In all honesty, nothing could be further from my mind.  What I'm really craving is a bucket of ice cold Coca Cola, filled with ice cubes.  Mmmmmmmmmmmm.  Food wise, I've been watching every cookery programme on tv recently and I'm desperate for some curried king prawns griddled!!  Or some green-lipped mussels drizzled in garlic and white wine...

Right, I've made my mouth water now - off for a milk-shake through my PEG... *sigh*

All the best, count down the days with me....

Nigel xx