I think as this blog has now entered its 3rd month I should be allowed a downbeat posting??
I feel shocking today. And thats a whole lot better than I felt yesterday... I will bring you up to speed.
Went to Weston Park on Monday, checked in on the ward and then went for my first radiotherapy session. It was quite painful - not the radiotherapy session but the laying down with the newly installed PEG. The radiotherapy nurse exclaimed that she thought the peg looked infected - that would be serious under normal circumstances but when I was to undergo chemotherapy (which kills your immune system) it was more serious than that...
Went back to the ward - they had a look and they too thought there were signs of some infection. I also had a high temperature - not a good start.
Later my temperature was taken again, a dietician called to check the PEG - and we weretold it seemed ok and we were on for the chemo. The chemotherapy plan arrived - I was due to start a saline drip at 5, a litre to be pushed through me over 3 hours, a second saline drip at 8, the chemo at 11 and then 2 more saline solutions, meaning I would be connected to the machine for some 15 hours.
The night on the drip went extremely slowly. I watched 3 films, The Simpsons Movie, Crash and Sandra Bullock in the Premonition. I read my Peter Swan autobiography. I tried unsuccessfully to sleep. And all the time listening to the quiet whirring of the pump. Occasionally the machine would make a bleeping noise if I moved my hand and obstructed the flow - beep beep bop... I could hear beep beep bop from up and down the whole ward - all night - as other people linked up to their own lifelines struggled with the flow.
During the night I visited the toliet around 20 times - trailing my pump with me - and hoping that the constipation I had suffered since Friday would come to an end. It didn't. It still hasn't today. I was reminded of an old rhyme from my schooldays;
"Here I sit, broken hearted, paid my penny, only f*rted" 
The following morning I was released from the pump and sent to the Radiotherapy Room, then back to the ward to await medication to take home. I was issued with anti-sickness drugs, steroids, painkillers and antibiotics for the potentially infected peg. My daily dose of tablets was to be some 36 capsules. I also was prescribed a sachet of Movitol for the constipation.
On arrival at home I took my first set of pills, then the Movitol, and threw the whole lot up within 1 minute. The sight of the capsules in the sink really disturbed me and I absolutely broke my heart for a good 20 minutes. Over the course of the afternoon, and interspersed betwen regular visits to call Huey on the big white telephone - I continued to break my heart. This is not going to be easy.
At 6pm we called Weston Park to see if there was anyting we could do - and a doctor arrived at 8pm to inject me with anti-sickness medication - the first and hopefully last time I will ever be injected in my bottom. I slept lots, went to bed (being sick along the way) and managed to have a reasonable (under the circumstances) nights sleep.
This monrng I went back to Weston Park for more radiotherapy and was prescribed a stronger anti-sickness pill. It seems to stop you from being sick - but doesn't prevent you from feeling sick...
And thats where I am now - back at home - perched on the settee and wishing I posessed a time machine capable of whizzing me forward 7 weeks. I know many of you have been waiting for news - I hope you will excuse me if I sign off now...
All the best
Nigel xx
